So, goal = not met. I applied for 2 positions last week, and will do some more this week.....I blame getting sick over the weekend for not being successful. I felt super sick every time I ate anything, so I was just really off all weekend. So....oops.
I do have an ever growing spreadsheet that is constantly taunting me and making me feel guilty. And friends who are doing the same for me.
Life right now is...complicated? It feels that way at least. Personal things always crop up when least expected/when they are least convenient, right? That's how I'm feeling though. But it's also really good. I feel surrounded by love lately.
I really don't think I have that much to say to y'all right now....I feel like I should be stalking institutions that I'm applying to and figuring out how to make my cover letter align with their mission statement without sounding like a stalker. Not sounding like a stalker is probably helpful in this whole getting a job thing.
Basically, it's going to take complete fear to really get me on this thing. And I'm getting very close to that, especially realizing how much school work I have left for the semester. The end of my semester is loaded down...and by that I really mean from Spring Break onward. And Spring Break is next week. Fantastic. I had a mini panic attack waking up this morning....that is not a feeling that I miss. To explain a little...last spring I was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder/general depression. That's probably not what you're expecting a future student affairs professional to be saying, and I really don't talk about it often, so consider yourselves lucky. I do think it's important to talk about though; we assume that everyone has this particular personality and comfort with things, and it's not always the case. Anyway, I'm happy to have had an amazing support system during the process, and I'm happy to say that I'm doing about a million times better than this time last year.
So...why did I bring it up? Right. The panic attack. Well, when I get overwhelmed I can get a little paralyzed, and I felt that way a bit when thinking about the amount of schoolwork I have left for the semester, on top of everything else. But I can handle it. I know that. I think right now is just really difficult for me because I've learned that uncertainty is one of my "triggers" if you will. So this whole graduating in May and having no clue where I'll be by July or August is really challenging for me. I also know how hard it was to move here and have to "start over" and I'm not looking forward to doing it again, though I think I've discussed that before on here.
Anyway, I feel better sharing that. It's a constant challenge, but what's life without challenge?
Speaking of challenge....my roommate has laid down the gauntlet in our house. My other roommate was a little intimidated...
hasta la vista!
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