Looking for Life, Love, and Laughter...And a Job #5

So....I will be 24 on Sunday and evidently I have learned nothing in these many years on the planet. It is currently 11:23 pm, and I leave for Creating Change in less than 12 hours (if my former roomie wants to be picked up at the airport at an appropriate time...) - and I have exactly 0 things packed. Well, that's kind of a lie. I do have my confirmation page, my handouts for the panel I am speaking on, and my name tag laid out on my desk. That's a start, right? 

I am unbelievably excited but also extremely overwhelmed about my first national conference. I know it is going to be an AWESOME opportunity and my mind will be blown with info and cool people, but five straight days of being "on" is going to be tough -- in case you missed that awkward part of my very first post when I talked about being the most outgoing introvert ever....well, conferences are going to be a tough thing for me. Luckily I have my co-intern from the summer who will be one of my roommates, and one of my closest friends and mentors from undergrad will be there - having people I'm very comfortable with definitely helps put me at ease. So, overall I'm more excited than anxious...but that isn't helping my suitcase get packed any faster.

I probably won't post again until Sunday or Monday because I will be out doing and learning wonderful things to help make the world a better place for everyone. So I'll share a few updates for my faithful readers who are waiting with bated breath....

First, in my last post I noted that my relationship had been rocky and was stressing me out. My partner knows I'm writing this blog (though I didn't know she checked it so frequently...? haha) and confronted me shortly after I posted. We actually had a really good talk and worked things out; I feel a lot better. It's just hard right now because I feel like I'm being really selfish in terms of our relationship, but I also feel a little justified in that selfishness --- surely there's a better way of phrasing that so I don't sound like a terrible person? What I mean is I'm dealing with so much right now...job search, conferences, COMPS, classes, prac + work...everything....and it's important stuff. Stuff that affects my life pretty seriously. So I feel like I need to be a little selfish and focus on those things, if that makes sense? Regardless, we talked a lot and got on the same page, which always helps.

Second, I'm officially now 0 for 2 in the job search. I had a "quick convo" (which is evidently code for mini-interview) with a rep from HR the other day and received an email later in the day; apparently nothing wrong with me except that I can't start until mid-May. Oh well, timing happens. At least that's something that I know wasn't my fault. C'est la vie. 

Third, comps are just over 2 weeks away and I feel like every time I study I learn less. One of my close friends who finished the program last year said he felt the same way, but then during the last week before everything just kind of came together and it was fine. I wish that moment would happen sooner for me.

And finally...I HATE shopping, especially for interview clothes. It's impossible. I'm not a suit person, so trying to force myself into it is really hard. What else is acceptable for interviews? I wish I was one of those people (shout out to my Gingeraffe, who also reads this) who can just go into their closet and pull out something classy and chic and stylish with no problem at all. I can't even do that after 7 hours of shopping and a probably maxed out credit card....


So, the mood in this post dropped quickly, haha. Really I'm in a pretty good place, except for having an empty suitcase. I think my laundry just finished, so I really should go start packing. 

Until next time!

Also, an ear worm for you if you want to know what's on repeat on my Spotify...